The problem I have now is that have a beautiful baby girl with one girl I impregnated whom I dont love. So, maybe try to establish a relationship with your baby now, stick it out for a year or so (w/o getting married), then once you've bonded w/the kid and proven you are a devoted dad, split up w/GF and file for custody. He pays for the stuff bc he can afford too and didn't want me working while pregnant which was fine when everything was good. Just not with her. General Baby Shower Wishes And Congratulations. This after-pregnancy condition is common, with roughly 70 to 80 percent of new mamas experiencing some degree of sadness. My girlfriend is pregnant and suddenly i realize that she may not be all i ever wanted. Open-Ended Questions To Ask A Girl (205 Open Ended Questions To Ask A Girl), How To Make A Girl Blush Over Text (101 Things To Say), How To Compliment A Girl Over Text (141 Ways), Qualities Of A Good Woman (29 Vital Qualities), How Often Should You Text A Girl To Keep Her Interested (25 Helpful Tips), Signs A Married Woman Wants You To Make A Move (23 Signs To Look For), How To Turn On A Woman With Words (155 Tips), 27 Obvious Signs A Woman Wants To Sleep With You, Reasons Why Pisces Man Loves Scorpio Woman (9 Interesting Reasons), If He Doesnt Introduce You To His Friends, What Does It Mean? Some men can be very guarded and closed when it comes to expressing how they feel - it can almost feel like they are pulling away from you and leaves you wondering whether he's actually into you. Adults with kids don't need someone else to financially support them. Yes, her hormones will be out of whack. After a wonderful pregnancy I spontaneously gave birth at 29 weeks. the woman would be unhappy, miserable and resentful as well in the long run for marrying a man who doesnt love her or care if she exists. Sucked it up and did what I had to do for my kids. Right now her parents are planning to bring her over to my house. There are midnight feedings, changing diapers, rocking a screaming infant and little sleep. I know quite a few mothers who weren't ready (not that anyone ever is) to have a baby when they did and just grew to resent their child. but she didn't have her baby . We've been together 9. 'Don't expect rewards in love': woman, 32, who desperately wants a baby says she dated 100 men in a year, renewing marriage pressure debate in China A woman went on more than 100 dates. I am a single mom and have been for a few years- however, my first child was planned with my fiance' and we were madly in love and it was the greatest, happiest time of my life. There are reasons you should know and love yourself before you love someone else that will remind you to be true to yourself. Apparently that first year of raising the child is very stressful, specifically on the relationship. Learn more about, Realizing I Had PPD After Returning to Work as a Soldier in the U.S. Army, Planned c section too presumptuous??? THE MOTHER KNOWS THE FATHER DOESNT LOVE HER NOW GUESS WHAT SHE IS ALSO MISARABLE! Having a baby is a life-changing experience and many want to ensure they do it at a time that is right for them. She's too far along to have an abortion.,. It will not update but downgrade yourself. We won't agree with you, if we think you are not right, sorry, girl! love should beget love and not hate or fear..something society always fails to learn. Source these things out and make a plan to leave. To help you make the fewest blunders possible, let me give you a few tips: 1. But there's something extraordinary about the energy level of a little boy. It is something i always knew deep down but i never acted on it. Spend time with like-minded people who love and respect your choices. She bullied me into a wedding & now I am miserable. Sometimes people make choices to abort, adopt, or keep the child. I must contain all this and somehow manage it thus minimizing any possible damage. Trust me dude, do whatever you have to to end this A.S.A.P. I don't know how I can be a great weekend father. I want to be a father!!! His baby mama got engaged to some dude while pregnant calls her fiance the kid's 'daddy', despite my friend wanting to be a father to his child. A friend of mine just had a kid w/ someone 1-2 weeks before meeting his current GF (who he loves but is probably leaving him over this - who can blame her?) I have 6 sisters and three brothers. Copyright 2017 - 2022 by LoveDevani.com. SCENARION 4: HAVE AN OBORTION. In the end its all about the kids. I know many people that don't feel a connection to their babies for whatever reason until they are born, it happens and it will definitely change once you see his little face. Note that once you confirm, this action cannot be undone. There is very little physical attraction. Find out to see whether he actually likes you by taking this quick free quiz. MzGee Ditches 3Music TV To Take Over Nana Ama McBrowns Show At UTV. So you have been together 9yrs, do you have other children you need to think about as well? They hurt the most. Need help, advice? @Teejay,hahahahaha, that cracked me up, but coming back to the issue, what da hell???? Call your old boss, call family and friends, research aid and stop telling yourself you're stuck. Rightfully so! You need to get in contact with services and leave. He is a grown up. You have to do what you feel is right. Everything that we do, we have to bear all consequences. ( though I don't see the first one as a mistake because making babies should not be a mistake.it is the natural order of things).you cant force people to do things out of their wishes and desires. And when the oldest child was about 10, I finally left. Broken heart is a usual thing but, what is bad is the action that people choose to take to heal the broken heart itself. She has done nothing wrong and I feel I am just going to destroy her life! To think about the kids. I got my, now wife, pregnant but she never loved me, in fact a month before she got pregnant she actually went to spend the night with some dude at a hotel in a different city, but she told me she just wanted to go away for a couple of days. His family is great also. but honestly did society really win? Is anyone in the same situation. Group Black's collective includes Essence, The Shade Room and Naturally Curly. Falling in love again at 47 and marrying for the second time at 52 was a miracle. Opinions please. I used to . THE CHILD UNSTABLE, EVEN MORE **** UP. Having a baby with someone you don't love. My pregnant girlfriend doesnt seem to want me around. SCENARIO 1: STAY WITH HER BECUASE SHE IS PREGNANT (THIS IS THE FOUNDATION OF THE RELATIONSHIP). Your post will be hidden and deleted by moderators. Aim to have a better and best partner that you can have. Moreland told me, "Some moms have that immediate, overwhelming, love-at-first-sight feeling with their newborns; others don't. And that's okay. I JUST came here to vent not telling people I'm snobby or lazy which I've never been! Idnt also think the said mother would marry someone who wouldnt make her happy. She is a good person, and a fantastic catch for somebody unfortunately that person is not me. Life is beautiful but you don't have a clue Sun and ocean blue Their magnificence, it don't make sense to you Black beauty, oh oh oh Black beauty, oh oh oh I paint the house black My wedding dress black leather too You have no room for light Love is lost on you I keep my lips red To seem like cherries in the spring Darling, you can't let everything Single. Mia, the fascinating thing about postpartum depression and anxiety is that it isn't logical. As for my girlfriend, I love this person and i will do my best to make it work out. You are right it is not fair to her. I don't have any memories of them not fighting. I've been trying to put my pride/ego/whatever aside and be with her, but it really kills me. SCENARIO 2: STAY WITH THE PERSON YOU LOVE. By Simon Maybin. If you're still contemplating having a family, you're still young enough to have that luxury. This is it, i went and made my life more complicated than it already was by adding a new factor, a child, to the equation. AND THE END OF THE DAY IS ALSO HERS. I've been with my boyfriend for years and I still don't know if I love him. There are reasons on why you should never date a pothead. Op: I don't understand why you quit your job, but find a new one and go stay with family. If you don't want a baby, then you won't be having one. People don't know he has a daughter, which tells me he's not proud of her, or truly claiming her in any way. Add to Favorites. She doesn't want an abortion, and I know it sounds terrible but I keep hoping she will miscarry, however she is 16weeks gone and that's unlikely . As such, you'll need to spend time with both his child's mom and his child. He's not all bad. Do you think that she would let you be a father if you two were to split? Welcome! Know his concern about the current situation and discuss. Good luck to you. Please whitelist our site to get all the best deals and offers from our partners. Sometimes their families even paid a dowry to the groom . The baby grew in her, she birthed it, she fed it, and she nurtured it every step of the way. And 3 children. Every toddler boy I've ever met has a destructive streak I am just not into. AND THIS ALSO INCLUDES AN UNHAPPY CHILD. I was literally about to break up with her (we were in the process of breaking up), when she announced she was pregnant. I want to love this baby, but I can't shake how I feel. Start off by talking about your family, how you're feeling about work and home in general, and your love for your wife. I dont want to jump into marriage as if its a job contract I am signing expecting that one day it will expire. maybe take a pre-marital class and figure out some common ground to build a relationship on Nine years ago I was mad in love with my first boyfriend. Long story short, I don't love my pregnant girlfriend. And both of you surely need to stay in touch. Sadly having a baby can create a rift between parents. I'm a **** if I lie and say I love her and be with her. May you both be happy and healthy. "People would say, 'I don't want to have a baby because I don't have money or I don't have time or I don't have a partner,'" he says. And one of the problems is the appearance of a question having a baby with someone you don't want to be with, how to deal with it? Best wishes for a lifetime of happiness. I'm sorry this is long but I have no one else. form is an illusion. My girlfriend admitted to me that she cheated. I would rather someone abort a child they don't want than to have the child and it end up neglected and in the system as it got older. I know life would be so much easier if we were together, but I don't know if it's worth it. Having A Baby With Someone You Don't Want To Be With, How To Deal With It? Long story short, I don't love my pregnant girlfriend. You don't want support, you just want to hear he is a bad guy and you are a victim. So, chances are, she's not speaking as she normally would. advice needed h heatha_heatha Posted 2/4/14 My boyfriend and I have only been together since November. I feel bad for you but you basically gave him the green light to control you. I'm having a baby with someone I'm not in love with. Take public transportation until you can get your own car and focus on your baby. He's provided for me financially, has given me a house and a car, and is really into being a father. Begin speaking about the kids, as well, mentioning different accomplishments they've made lately . Group Leaders arent expected to spend any additional time in the community, and are not held to a set schedule. Ex My moving on process. 4. YOU'LL BE STABLE. Time passed and we just got comfortable being there. Also my ex is unlikely to have children which in her case actually doesn't matter to me. You're an adult. Where are you from? Does it feels good to fake your feelings? You can't force yourself to love him. A lot of women are alone while pregnant or with young children and they have a life they can be proud of. we should always strife to solve a problem no matter how painful by looking at its essence and its core and not from its form. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. It happens almost all the time that children involved in such situations rather suffer the consequencies. I was in love with someone else. When I had my first baby as a young single mom, I didn't have a car and I figured it out with the help of my family. Welcome to the world little one! go and apologise. Sounds like she was looking for a sugar daddy and ended up getting pregnant. Long story as short as possible! My partner works alot which I think is the cause of us not having any connection? That showed up as a third factor." The guy obviously does not love the girl in question yet went ahead and had a baby with her out of wedlock. I wish I wasn't pregnant by him. we had protected sex twice, in December, and I got pregnant. You moved into his house, you let him buy you a car and you quit your job because he was financial there. In fact, I was planning on breaking up with him right before I found out I was pregnant. Sex can lead to pregnancy and I'm assuming you knew the possibility of pregnancy when you made the choice. We respect everyones right to express their thoughts and opinions as long as they remain respectful of other community members, and meet What to Expects Terms of Use. That's what we tackle in today's blog. LoveDevani is an independent website. I don't know if that's just hormones talking or what! My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. If you have the "baby blues" you might not notice the sadness or moodiness right away. The best alterantive is if you can be amicable and stay friends w/your child's mother and cooperate for the kid's sake, although w/the emotions involved that isn't always possible. What to Expect supports Group Black and its mission to increase greater diversity in media voices and media ownership. We are two total opposite people. I make significantly more income then her, so I know she will need the child support, which will at least allow me to be in my child's life, but I don't want my child to be exposed to an unhappy marriage. So today at my apt (weekly NST/ ultrasound due to Covid protocol) baby girl measured 8lb 2 ounces and short so they are saying she will be a big baby and have a big headI had my cervix checked and Im not dilated any nor has Hi all. Only knowing that you don't feel good with your current situation won't make any change unless you do. I have many regrets from the past and can't bear to add another one to the long list. Long story short: we've togheter Long distance girlfriend pregnant and is thinking about breaking up. Man and woman making love in bed. Either way, I was ready to "play house". You should do what will make you happy. Good luck. Last updated on June 9, 2022 by Michelle Devani There are many things that may cause a broken heart. So are you guys in a relationship or just friend with benefits? I don't know what to do. Most were married to . Anyways, we decided to get marry after finding out that she was pregnant, even though I had my doubts if it was my baby or not. I think it's best to do what will make you the happiest. 2005-2023Everyday Health, Inc., a Ziff Davis company. This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply. YOU CANNOT PROVIDE HAPPINESS WHEN YOU ARE NOT HAPPY. Americans love coffee. I FEEL SORRY FOR THE GIRL INVOLVED. It was enough for me to be content, while I gave the kids a life that I never had. I do love her a lot as a person but i am not in love with her. cos it not easy to becme a single mother huh. BUTI had such a crappy childhood, I valued that more than I did my own personal happiness. @jessi, LMFAOI like ur commentVery BLUNT and to the POINT. "We are. Are these issues still there? Likewise, it's also draining, frustrating, and time-consuming. Would I do it again? "All of the rational thoughts. "Most women will find intercourse painful up until the three-month mark," notes Ross. I pretended to be. With the lowest fertility rate in the . SHE DESERVES A SAYING IN THIS! A woman isn't damaged after engaging in sex, having a baby, or ending a bad relationship. So family pressured us to get married. Good luck! In some cases it works, but for many it doesn't. He's not all bad. the guy might turn into a psychopath and malevolent towards the girl.he would also probably turn into a serial cheater and wife beater which is usually what happens. Chosing to be in a rebound relationship to forget the past and aiming for some fun also cause a problem. I know she doesn't want to be with me and I stop loving her and I don't want to be with her anymore. Does he still love me? This may not change her decision, but best to be honest. He made a baby with you but doesn't seem to support you financially and you don't live together. My daughter was born healthy, but of course small. It was very stressful. **** will get tough before it gets better, but it will work out in the end. Welcoming your new baby with wishes of health, joy and plenty of sleep. It's the kind of care for your emotions, feelings, and love. Now i have sleepless nights trying to find an angle but without success. Saturday 4 Mar 2023 10:00 am. So remember to try to be the best of you. You need to be upfront and honest nothing is worse than being lied to when feelings are involved. Why not sharing in the upbringing of the child? @jessi, how come i never get to meet these kind of guys,i swear i would have cut off your stupid sausage,put in the toilet and flush it off nonsence, @jessi, maame plz its rude to cut sumones sausage.sincerely the fault might come from the gal,maybe she did self arrangement ahohyehy3.and resulted in the pregnancy. That doesn't mean you give up your relationship w/the child, you will have to share custody, and likely pay support (unless you have the kid more than she does, but that's rare). Don't let ANY women determine for you when you will become a father! CLICK HERE to subscribe to our daily up-to-date news!! Create an account or log in to participate. Even when you first meet your new child, don't put expectations on how you should feel. For all the guys out there who think a woman is the stepping stone to the next onewear a condom. A. We live together, that's all I can say, we have nothing else. ( though I dont see the first one as a mistake because making babies should not be a mistake.it is the natural order of things).you cant force people to do things out of their wishes and desires.
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